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Can a teenage child refuse to visit one of their parents post-divorce?

On Behalf of | Oct 5, 2024 | Child Custody And Visitation

Adults co-parenting in California often find themselves disagreeing about decisions regarding their children and their parenting schedules. The family courts generally expect the parents should cooperate with each other in a shared custody scenario.

They should keep the focus on what is best for their children and encourage healthy interactions rather than interfering in one another’s relationship with the children. In some cases, there may be questions about a child’s preferences. Particularly when the children and the family become teenagers, they may assert themselves and try to influence the parenting schedule. For example, a high school student might begin stating that they do not want to spend time with one of their parents.

Can young adults refuse to follow court-approved custody or parenting time arrangements?

Preferences from children do matter

Some parents think of custody disputes as a black-and-white issue. They believe that everyone in the family and in the family court system should adhere to the established court order. However, teenagers have very intense emotions and social preferences. While they don’t have to express a preference during custody proceedings, the courts can take the wishes of a child of age 14 or greater into consideration.

Parents may find that trying to force their children into compliance only worsens the situation. It is generally incumbent upon both parents in the family to abide by the custody order and encourage the children to do the same. However, a judge hearing an enforcement case involving a teenager who refuses to spend time with one parent may inquire as to the teenager’s preferences.

In scenarios where teenagers can clearly articulate a reason for their preferences, a judge may decline to enforce or modify a custody order. Taking the time to reconnect after a disruption in the relationship can be more effective than immediately trying to enforce the existing custody order. Especially if there has been a disruption in parent-child interactions, reunification therapy might be a good option for a parent not getting the time with their teenagers they desire.

In rare cases where there is evidence of one parent promoting alienation through negative talk, a judge may consider granting a custody order modification.

Reviewing the conduct of their child and the behavior of their child’s other parent with a skilled legal team can help a frustrated parent determine how to handle denied parenting time.

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